Operation Grass Is Greener

Yeah!!! We finally have a new front door.

Here is why:

See the lovely gap underneath? My husband tried to fix it without replacing the entire door, but with the way it was built and the way the gap was there was no way to do that. (In fact in talking to several of our neighbors, they are also having the same problem with their front doors as well.) Consequently, we had drafts and bugs that would get through. YUCK!

And here is what we have now:

We have to replace the trim on the inside, but at least there is no more gap! What was really "nice" was that the guy who installed it proceeded to tell us of the issues of the frame thanks to the "fabulous - NOT" builders of this house. One more reason I really don't like were we live.

Anyway, it is done and one more project is off of our list of things to do to get this house ready.

Seriously?!

I am so ANNOYED! I have been busting my butt, literally, working out at least once if not two times a day. I have been really good about watching what I eat and avoiding sugar and simple carbs as much as possible. (Not easy when I made two batches of cookies for neighbors.) I realize it has only been 2 weeks and 1 day, but 0 pounds lost. Seriously?!

I am giving this until the end of July. If nothing changes, then I guess I get to go back to the doctor and will probably have to be put back on Metformin. UGH! You would think that since I am unable to have any more children, the fates would at least smile on me enough to let me have some type of movement towards the body that I want.

Grrrrrrrr! Grrrrrrrrr! Grrrrrrr! Can I throw myself on the ground and throw my tantrum now?

Maybe This Will Help With Insight

I follow several blogs of women who are also struggling with infertility. Unfortunately, I did not read one until much later than I should because I found out that there is a Utah Infertility Awareness Conference. How I wish I had known about this early enough so that I could have gone, if nothing else to be able to be around other people who are going through this since often I feel very much alone. (My state soooooooo needs to get some of these resources. Even a support group would be nice.)

Anyway . . . . Lindsey from "The R House" was kind enough to share some of her notes from the conference. Here are my favorite since it helps to so eloquently put what women dealing with infertility go through:

Infertility has as great a psychological impact on women as someone dealing with a life-threatening disease.

"The problem is that infertility affects every aspect of a woman's life. It affects their relationship with their husbands because men and women don't respond to infertility in the same way. It affects their sex life because they're told when they can and can't have intercourse. It affects relationships with friends and family because everyone else seems to be getting pregnant effortlessly. It affects jobs because they have to miss tons of time for doctor's appointments and procedures. It can send them into a spiritual crisis. They feel cruddy because they're going through all these invasive tests and procedures which hurt. And it costs a ton of money."
-Alice Domar, health psychologist, Director of the Mind/Body Program for Infertility at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center, Harvard Medical School

If there is anything I wish that people would get is the psychological as well as the physical effect infertility treatments have on a person. Going through treatments just plain sucks. You feel cruddy all of they time and never mind the stress involved hoping that FINALLY it will all work.

I can't tell you how many meetings, appointments, or outings I have had to cancel or skip out on because frankly I just felt awful. Unfortunately, I have had to deal with some people who do not have any clue so there have been some hurtful things said and done because of my inability to function. Since they get to have children the "normal" way, they truly do not get it. Oh well. It is what it is.

Maybe that is my new calling in life, to educate and perhaps get something together for my state. Who knows? I am still in the grieving period so that is something to consider in the future. Guess we will see.

Another Great Recipe

I get easily bored with my standard recipes, so often I find myself scavenging the internet for good and healthy recipes (ie no cream, butter, sugar, etc.) It's a lot harder than it sounds, especially if you want something that tastes good and my EXTREMELY picky hubby will eat.

Tonight, the protein of choice was chicken and I needed something fairly quick since Little Man and I had swimming lessons at 6:30 and my husband usually doesn't get home until 5:30 pm. I found a great new recipe. It was given two thumbs up by my husband and was even allowed into the meal rotation. It is called "Brazilian Chicken" and is from the "Moms Who Think" website. Once again, the ingredients sound like an odd mixture such as lime and lemon juice with tomato sauce, but I promise it really is good! Also, it is a great grilling recipe, especially when you baste repeatedly with the marinade as stated in the directions. (Sorry there are no pictures. I was in a massive hurry and even left the kitchen a total disaster to make it to swimming on time.)

Give it a try. You just might find a new favorite.

Now off to Zumba!

Aren't They Pretty?

Here was my project for the day. I had bought a flat of HUGE strawberries from Bountiful Baskets and decided to make sugar free (That's right I said sugar free.) strawberry jam. And we are not talking the sissy freezer jam. The actual process bottle jam.

There was enough for 9 12 oz. jars, and ironically enough it came out exact! Woohoo!

Now on to the box of apricots . . . . .

So Why the Health Kick?

After I had our son, I talked to my doctor about what I could do to avoid having HELLP Syndrome again if we were to have another child. My doctor was very frank with me and told me the best thing I could do was to get the weight off. Since I was classified in the obese category, I had no way of arguing against her. Instead I became determined and focused. So with the help of another doctor, I began dieting and exercising and lost 30 pounds. I was thrilled! I not only felt better, but was also in the "normal" category for weight for my age and build.

I wanted to lose another six pounds, but my husband and I decided to start trying to have children again. This meant tons of different medication, procedures, and little to no exercise allowed. This coupled with the stress and emotional eating that occurred for the last seven months, I gained back 20 of those pounds. I also had a physical last year and was informed that my cholesterol was sky high and that if I did not make some rapid changes I would be put on medication for the rest of my life that is not only extremely expensive, but I couldn't take while pregnant, and I could forget getting life insurance without paying an arm and leg.

Fast forward to the past couple of weeks . . . . One of the exercises that I would have my clients do when they were struggling with depression was to take a mental snapshot of their life how it currently is. I would then ask them what they would like/dislike about the picture and what they could do to change that picture. It would give them a sense of empowerment and would help them to see the power they had over parts of their own life. Consequently, I did this for myself due to the recent events, and frankly I didn't like what I saw. Among the many things I didn't like was my weight and current health status.

Weight and self-image has always been a huge issue for me and I have found that the heavier I am, the less social I am. I am too embarrassed to see people or even worse run into people from my past. Plus I hate the way clothes fit and consequently my wardrobe gets shabbier and shabbier since I do not feel worthy to wear cute clothes or think that the sizes that do fit just look frumpy. So, it was time I took matters into my own hands and do something about, so once again I am embarqing on a lifestyle change. To help keep me motivated I have smaller goals that result in a "reward" when I reach them. For example, 9 more pounds and I get to go to the local running store and get customized running shoes.

We will see how it goes. One day at a time. Wish me luck! You will probably see more changes or goals along the way, so stay tuned.

You've Just Gotta Try This!

Okay, so we are trying to eat healthier around here (more on why later) and in doing so, my hubby gets extremely nervous since he does not and I mean NOT do vegetables. Consequently, I have to get extremely creative and he gets the "pleasure" of expanding his pallet a little. Sometimes it works (i.e. faux mashed potatoes made with cauliflower) and sometimes I get a lukewarm response while I am just loving it.

Tonight I tried a new recipe. I LOVED it! I mean, seriously LOVED, it! Hubby: lukewarm (meaning would eat it again but would not request it.) Yeah! More leftovers for me.

(Photo courtesy from ourbestbites.com)

It is a yummy quinoa and mango salad that I got from Our Best Bites and they got it from The Biggest Loser (except the added Kosher salt). It is so healthy and yummy even without the salt, which I omitted. It also could easily serve as a vegetarian meal, if you are into that sort of thing, which I also try to do at least once a day.

Anyway, you can find it here: Quinoa and Mango Salad. Pair that with a Mojito Chicken (Grilled chicken with fresh lime juice, lime zest, mint, and olive oil - I know weird combo, but trust me it works!) and you have a fabulous healthy meal that makes yummy leftovers.