Release the Beast!

One of the memorable moments that I had with one of the kids I have worked with over the years in juvenile corrections was when a teenage girl told me that she would give anything to have her father give her a curfew. I was shocked when she said this, since most kids put up a great fight regarding curfews. So I inquired of her to give a further explanation. She explained that her father giving her a curfew would mean that he actually cared about her and wanted her to be safe. I have never forgotten that moment.

Today my dear husband had a similar lesson. Last night his daughter called his phone and since it was on vibrate in the kitchen, we did not hear the phone. Consequently, she left a nastygram phone message and demanded a phone call back. As you can imagine he was hesitant to return the call this morning because he did not want to start the day off with a fight with an irrational teenager. So I suggested that he call shortly before she needed to leave for school so that the conversation be kept short. He called me later this morning to tell me that sure enough, she began yelling and carrying on. This time instead of taking it, like he usually does, he simply told her, "You need to check your attitude." To which she promptly hung up on him.

Of course, Jim was upset and frustrated but stood his ground and did not try to call her again, but instead insisted that she be polite. This afternoon she called again but this time was much more pleasant and didn't yell, ask for money or demand that we buy her something, which is the usual protocol that works with her mother and has in the past worked with him.

We know that she will try to release the snarly beast side of her again, but I am so proud of him for setting a boundary and sticking with it! And although she will never admit, deep down she is proud of him, too.